‘What is Gentle Parenting?’, is a question that has been asked by many parents, many a time. If you’re one of those people for whom the term ‘gentle parenting’ is completely new, you’re not alone.
The thing is, choosing a parenting style isn’t a conscious decision we make when we become parents. Some of us might even use our childhood experiences in creating a blueprint for what we need to avoid in our own parenting styles.
In this article we will explain to you all about the Gentle Parenting Approach, and how you can try it out in your everyday family life.
Firstly, a closer look at Gentle Parenting and all that it entails.
What Gentle Parenting Means
In a nutshell, Gentle Parenting is a parenting approach that encourages a partnership between you and your child. One that encourages them to make choices based on an internal willingness, instead of external pressure.
This parenting style demands that you become aware of the behavior you model for your child. Encouraging compassion, it embraces emotions and accepts the child as a whole, capable being.
The Gentle Parenting Approach
In this section we will take a closer look at the three primary components of Gentle Parenting: empathy, understanding and respect.
Empathy. This entails putting yourself into your child’s shoes, in an attempt to understand what needs or emotions are shaping their behavior. For instance, empathizing with your child in painful times – like undergoing a major transition.
Understanding. This is all about understanding your child’s behavior and needs in the context of their developmental level. A classic example of this is ‘understanding’ when your child falls to the floor and starts crying. While this is a strict no-no behavior in the case of adults, it is more acceptable for young children because their abilities to regulate their emotions is limited.
Respect. You need to be able to treat your child the way you would want to be treated yourself. Here, parents are encouraged to focus on teaching and guiding, instead of dictating. Things like commanding, criticizing and even yelling, are strictly forbidden. An example of showing ‘respect’ is this: If a child has thrown a toy at someone, you could calmly suggest an alternative. You could say something to the tune of ‘Throwing toys at people might hurt them. Throw them on the bed instead!’
The Benefits of Gentle Parenting
The Gentle Parenting Approach is beneficial in creating a bond in more ways than one. Here’s a look at all the reasons why Gentle Parenting might just make for your preferred parenting style.
Reduced Childhood Anxiety
The Gentle Parenting Approach reduces the likelihood of a child experiencing Childhood Anxiety. This is largely owing to the fact that the Gentle Parenting Style provides a supportive and encouraging Home Environment.
Reduced Childhood Anger
We all know how angry children can get. Often, the root cause of that anger is all that shame, blame and punishment that parents mete out to their children. Gentle Parenting steps in here, honoring the self-worth of kids, ensuring they don’t cover up their feelings of shame and fear with anger.
Harnessing Positive Social Skills
Learning about boundaries and cultivating a sense of empathy, are things that even little children need to know. Thanks to Gentle Parenting, kids can manage to maneuver themselves in socially challenging situations.
It Strengthens the Bond between Parent and Child
The most important things that you can give your children are free. They are your love, your time and support. Parents who employ the Gentle Parenting Style, can thus form a closer bond with their children.
The Drawbacks of Gentle Parenting
Now that you have seen the ‘good stuff’ of Gentle Parenting a.k.a. its benefits, it’s prudent to take a look at its drawbacks. That will serve to answer the question, ‘Does Gentle Parenting Work’, in a far more efficacious manner.
Perhaps one of the main drawbacks of gentle parenting, is the fact that it is too time-consuming. You have to be very hands-on where it comes to redirecting your child when working alongside them. This becomes most difficult to implement, when you have only two hours a day to spend with them.
Yet another challenge is parents and caregivers having to struggle with discipline problems. It can be very hard to enforce solid boundaries with your kids. Parents might find themselves struggling, as they allow their children to make choices to the extent that they become the authority in the relationship.
Gentle Parenting Techniques
Are you looking for some Gentle Parenting Techniques that you can start practicing with your kids today? Here’s a look at some invaluable parenting techniques that will help you do just that.
Setting Age-Appropriate Boundaries
You cannot treat a 2-year-old the same way you would, a 4-year-old. Respect the fact that they might not be old enough to do the things you expect of them.
Reasons for Boundaries
While it is perfectly all right to point out to your child the lines that cannot be crossed, it’s important to tell them why. ‘Because I said so’ is simply not the answer you want to give them.
Using choice words instead of raising your voice
When you raise your voice, it does little to benefit your child. Instead, try explaining your point of view to them using positive and gentle wording.
Punish the action, not the child
Everyone makes mistakes, and so will your child. It’s important that you point out their mistakes, and teach them the right thing to do instead.
Collaboration over Compliance
It’s time to break down that guard you have created between you and your child. Let there be no ‘adult’ or ‘child’ in the relationship, to help them become the best versions of themselves.
At Eurokids we do all we can to ensure that children grow up to be confident, independent and happy. Gentle Parenting works toward the same effect. While traditional parenting styles focus on punishment and reward, Gentle Parenting works largely by focusing on age-appropriate development.